About NPD Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Once you stop feeding the narcissist’s ego your needs become inconsequential to him. 

I spent a couple years capitulating, attempting to negotiate and fix the problems between us believing that if I gave respect I would eventually receive respect. I did what a lot of women do who are dealing with the aftermath of divorce from a narcissist. I rolled over and over and over playing nice doggy hoping that one day he would rub my belly, and we could put all the conflict behind us.

You get nothing from all the effort you put into being civil with the narcissist. As long as you are in any type of relationship with a narcissist, you can bet the only person who will benefit from that relationship is the narcissist.

Let go of expecting him to converse with you as if you are an equal. [x]

Don't submit to him. He wants control. Don't be his victim. Don't care. Be happy. That's why he's leaving you, because he didn't want your friends to have any control because that would be taking control away from him. 

Narcissism and divorce are also connected because marriage to a narcissist is one of daily sacrifice on the part of the other partner who has to keep giving up more and more expectations and needs to satisfy the narcissist. [x]

Yes, he may have loved you. He may be incredibly handsome, a great lover, and an interesting person, but notice how much of what he has done is self referential. He is far from selfless. [x]

Remember the gifts in the beginning? It was bait. Once he had me under his thumb, that's when he started treating you like shit.

Know you are strong. Don’t just say it, let it resonate from your very soul. You are breaking free of the pain he lives for causing you. You deserve to be happy. Learn and research, then have a plan. You can do this. [x]

I brought up causing a ruckus and showing a judge evidence of his excessive herb use. That's when he said he'd block my number, and that's why I think he's keeping things civil... Also, I think depression is creeping on him.

He is not your problem anymore. He cannot be fixed. He cannot love or trust genuinely. You were only there to kiss his ass and discarded when you refused.

Apart from such crisis intervention, most therapists believe that this disorder is very difficult to treat. Long term therpy is essential. They view themselves as being superior, and thus feel entitled to be callous, self-centered, and greedy. Their viewpoint is that life is the "survival of the fittest", and they are the "fittest". These individuals lust after fame, fortune and power. Many of these individuals achieve high positions in politics, religion and commerce. Most religious cult leaders have severe Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

The effectiveness of treatment for Narcissistic Personality Disorder is unknown because there are no randomized controlled trials. Individuals with this disorder seldom voluntarily present for treatment. [x]

"So what we’ve only been dating for two months. How about we get married?" he asks. This might be true love. On the other hand, you might have hooked up with a narcissist who uses charm to woo his victims so he can fill his empty self with the qualities you possess.

We moved in together pretty quick, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. Since his ex was gone, he would've needed a roommate to afford the place, which he didn't want. I wanted out of my parents house since I was an adult now. I trusted him since he treated me so well and was so comfortable around him. I thought it was a sign to take a risk. I still don't regret that decission, even if the drive was a bitch.
We lasted together good for a year and a half before talking about getting married. From what I learned by enduring my previous partner, "You don't know someone until you lived with them..." The signs were there... I just didn't know to look for them. I wish I knew something like NPD existed. I simply knew I didn't want anyone who was addicted to video games. I was smitten with how well he treated me at the time... Didn't smoke weed back then... 

The sick narcissist's sense of self-worth and self-esteem derive entirely from audience feedback because the narcissist has no self-esteem or self-worth of his own. In the absence of observers, the narcissist shrivels to non-existence and feels dead. [x]

I think about this and pity him, but you can't help those who don't want help or don't feel there's a problem.